Shed: a poem

Tommie Christopher Brown is the girl with a full boy name. Currently living in a small town in Southern California, Tommie is a writer whose style spreads from poetic to academic, but finds home somewhere marrying the two. She has a BA in English studies with a focus in Philosophy and has recently written and worked for VICELAND, WORD Agency, and Mitu. Read more of her work here.

The rhythms of nature have always orchestrated inside of me. The ebbing and flowing of the ways of the living, The terse stillness that comes only with death. My roots are watered by my welcoming that nothing exists without expiration.

The first words I ever understood were in the language of endings. I told my mother I raced to leave her body two months early Because I have always been the one who decides when it is my time to let go.It is not who I am to wade in waters, Wasting time with versions of myself I no longer am.

Apart of nature, I shed the skin I have outgrown, Refusing to be restricted by things that have lost their purpose. Like the strands of hair that molt from my head, I dust them from my body to the ground, making no hesitation in parting with what I grew. The same hair that you, little bird, gather for your nest.

Trailing behind me, I watch as you collect the pieces of me I have already forgotten, Gathering and keeping them as your own. Toiling and tying, you take what once was mine And use its strength to build yourself a home. Somewhere safe and warm where you can rest inside the ghost of who I am.

Little bird, do not hide your face in shadows of shame like thieves do. You cannot steal what was free for the taking; I do not curse you for making use of debris. So make your altars and your bed out of the only me you have left, And kneel at both as you practice this worship. You have taken nothing that wont grow back stronger.

Rename me Hydra, I am giddy for the losses. With every head you cut off, I grow back two. No need to scurry to collect my death, I will always haunt you with more. Even now, I offer my words to you in self sacrifice; carry them. I know how much you need me to survive your winter.